


Cafe Vengeance

by orphan_account



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: AU, Café, F/M, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Like intense AU, Tony owns a coffee shop, bros
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-24
Updated: 2014-10-23
Packaged: 2018-02-18 14:03:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2351036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony owns a coffee shop. Loki and Jarvis are employees.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Loki walks into the Café Vengeance, a small bell jingling over his head. He is so immersed in his Iphone that he nearly runs into a blond woman trying to leave, followed closely by a short bearded man. He turns to watch her go, straightening his green beanie. The short man stops next to him, watching the blond into the distance. “Man,” he says. “What a woman.” He claps a hand on Loki’s shoulder, and he almost recoils.  
“I’m Tony,” he drawls. “I’m the owner,” and Loki thinks he might be a little drunk.  
“Loki,” he says warily, looking around for some means of escape.  
Tony studies him with no little amount of intensity. “You must be the new hire. Never seen you around here before. Lemme introduce you to some of the regulars.”  
He pulls Loki from the door and starts leading him around the café, ignoring the piles of technical looking books and papers. Tony stops in front of a beat up leather sofa where a black man with an eye patch is typing furiously on a sleek laptop.  
“Hey, Fury,” Tony calls, and the black man raises a hand in acknowledgement. Tony turns them away and starts talking into Loki’s ear. “He doesn’t really say a whole lot. Don’t take it personally or he just might kill you.”  
They pass the counter, where a pale, blond man is making espressos with alarming speed and accuracy. “Hey, Jarvis,” Tony says, and the man looks up and grins wickedly.  
“Hey, Tony. Who’s the fresh meat?”  
Tony laughs. “Now, Jarvis. I didn’t hire you to terrify your colleagues.” Jarvis salutes mockingly, and they move on. “Good guy,” he comments. “Course, I had to teach him everything he knows.”  
Next, Tony takes Loki over to a tiny round table where a short, balding, bearded man is grading papers. “Dr. Erskine. How’s the chemistry class going?”  
The little man looks up briefly from his work. “Very good. The students show great promise,” he says in accented English.  
But Loki isn’t paying attention to Erskine anymore. At a table in the corner is a young couple, a man and a woman. They are not talking, not exactly, but they seem to be speaking to one another in glances and raised eyebrows and the pauses between breaths.  
Tony follows his gaze and punches him in the shoulder lightly. “That’s Clint and Natasha. They’re bodyguards, very specialized bodyguards,” and the way he says specialized makes Loki’s skin crawl in something between anticipation and dread. “You might want to watch out for them. They eat kids like you for breakfast.”  
Loki nods once, and Tony points out the next pair. This time, it is two men, on tall, blond and handsome in the way one usually attributes to statues and paintings of gods. The other is slightly shorter, with shoulder length brown hair and stubble.  
“That’s Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes,” Tony tells him, and Loki doesn’t need to be told anything other than their names. He recognizes them. They are the journalist pair that just recently exposed a scandal regarding some organization called HYDRA that was bribing Congress. They are legend in some circles, elevated to the status of myths and legends. In other circles, they are rumored to be spies, double agents for Russia, or gay lovers.  
“They come here?” he says in disbelief.  
Tony looks offended. “Of course they come here. It’s the best damned coffee in the city. Now shut up before they hear you.” And then he drags Loki over to the next table where, of course, his brother is sitting with a girl. Two girls, actually. Because apparently Thor just has a harem.  
Thor looks up from his Pumpkin Spice latte and grins his cheesy grin up at him. “Brother!” he booms, and Loki wishes that he would stop doing that. Especially since they’re not even technically related by blood. They two girls turn to look at him in unison, brows raising simultaneously.  
The one with glasses is struck mute for a moment, while the other one immediately starts chattering away to Thor. Tony looks between the two, noting Loki’s barely concealed hatred and Thor’s well meaning noncomprehension and pulls Loki bodily by the arm towards the counter.  
He starts work the next day and honestly enjoys it, which is more than he can say for most jobs he’s had in the past. Tony is very cool, and Jarvis is actually a lot nicer than he lets on. Darcy, of Thor’s harem, also works there, and the two of them get on well enough. He’s careful not to bring up his adopted brother ,and she takes her cue from him. They discuss a variety of topics, from Norse mythology (his passion, which she deems stupid) to the various uses of a taser. (Her passion, which he holds in grudging respect.)  
And he keeps an eye on the customers as well. Natasha and Clint are there almost every day, to the point where he starts to wonder when they do all this body guarding that Tony was so adamant about.  
And the two reporters show up every day around two, bickering about something. Loki finds out the answer to the rumors, too. They don’t come right out and say it, but the signs are there if you look closely. It’s in the way they look at each other, and the way their touches linger just a little too long for polite society.  
Thor comes in every once in a while, with the woman who he’s discovered to be his scientist girlfriend. Whenever that happens, he lets Jarvis deal with it. Thor looks at him like a kicked puppy, and Loki has to remind himself not to feel guilty. Because they’re not even related, for God’s sake!  
“If you’d only talk to Odin,” he says once. But Loki is already turning away to boil some milk.  
It’s on his third Saturday that they all come in together. Except Thor, who is at some kind of renewable energy convention in Puente Antiguo. Not that Loki cares. No. Certainly not. It happens around two, when the last of the lunch crowd is clearing out and Loki is about to start playing games on his phone.  
The five of them burst through the door in a sudden crescendo of laughter. Bucky has somehow managed to get his hand tangled in Natasha’s hair, to Clint’s obvious delight. Jane (Thor’s girlfriend, he reminds himself) is laughing at something Steve’s said, and Natasha looks strangely cheerful, for someone who’s got a hand in her hair.  
Tony grins manically when he sees them and abandons his laptop in order to go and talk. Loki glances over at Jarvis, who is staring at the group contemplatively.  
“Does this happen a lot?” he asks.  
Jarvis starts. “It’s kind of a Saturday thing. They haven’t been here the last few times, for whatever reason.”  
“And are they always this…” he gestures vaguely, searching for the proper words.  
But Jarvis seems to understand his meaning. “This is pretty low key for them.”  
Loki winces. Partly at the pun, but mostly because this has the potential to be a very long afternoon. But they seat themselves at one of the largest tables, which is also the farthest away from the cash register. Which is a small mercy he hadn’t expected to receive.  
Jarvis continues. “They call themselves the Avengers.” Loki gets it. Because it’s the Café Vengeance.  
“What, are they like a team or something?” he asks, keeping his expression carefully bland.  
But Jarvis just smiles wickedly. “You’ll just have to ask them yourself.” Loki shrugs and turns back to the register, where Natasha and Bucky have appeared. He jumps. God, but they are unnaturally quiet.  
Natasha cocks an eyebrow, while Barnes just snorts at his injured dignity. “We’d like a latte please, and a chocolate chip frappe for the coffee snob over here,” Barnes says, jerking a thumb at Natasha.  
Natasha slaps his hand away. “Who are you calling a coffee snob?” Loki moves to start making their drinks, watching out of the corner of his eye as they bicker with each other. What an odd couple. He wonders vaguely what Rogers thinks about it.  
Then he looks over at Rogers, who is deep in discussion with Tony and Jane, and decides he probably doesn’t care. Which he supposes makes their relationship a little less tumultuous. He hands the two their drinks and Natasha scrutinizes him. “I’ve never seen you here before,” she remarks, taking a sip of her frappe. She nods appreciatively.  
Barnes finishes her train of thought. “How long have you been here?”  
Loki has to think about it. “Three weeks.”  
Barnes whistles. “You’re losing your touch, Natashenka.” She scowls, punches him in the shoulder, and mutters something he doubts is complimentary in another language. Russian?  
“What’s your name?” she asks.  
“Loki Laufeyson,” he replies, and it’s actually true. The name change proceedings went through yesterday and he is taking every opportunity to use his new name. He even sent a mocking email to Odin, signing it Loki Laufeyson.  
Loki wonders if Frigga’s read it. He hopes not. He returns to the present, startled out of his reverie by Natasha sticking out her hand. “I’m Natasha Romanov,” she says, “and this meatball is James Barnes.”  
“Bucky,” the proclaimed James mutters, followed by, “Steve’s the only one who gets to call me a meatball.”  
Loki stares at the woman’s outstretched hand for a few second before taking it. Her grip is firm and warm, tighter than he’d expected. “I know who you are,” he says, and regrets it immediately. Her grip tightens like a vise, and Bucky Barnes is holding a straight razor to his throat before he can take another breath.  
“How do you know who she is?” he demands, knuckles white and voice low and threatening.  
Loki’s eyes widen and he holds his hands up in what he hopes is a conciliatory gesture. “Tony told me,” he says as calmly as he can manage.  
The two of them relax. The knife disappears and Natasha releases his hand. “Sorry,” they say in unison, and Bucky turns to look at the other group of people.  
“Tony,” he says in a faux jovial tone, “you might want to mention it the next time you tell the employees about us. We nearly killed Spring Onions over here.”  
Tony has the good grace to look slightly ashamed. “Sorry about that, Loki,” he says.  
Steve Rogers elbows him and starts whispering to Tony, before calling across the coffee shop. “Why don’t you come over and join us for a cup? Can’t have you thinking we’re all lunatics.”  
He looks at Tony, who nods, and then Jarvis, who winks encouragingly. “Go for it,” Jarvis says. “I’ll take care of things.”  
So that’s how Loki finds himself leaving his station in the middle of a shift to have a coffee with two people who tried to kill him, a renowned journalist, a prominent scientist, a “specialized bodyguard” and his boss.  
Never let it be said that his life isn’t interesting.


	2. In Which Loki Blames Tony Wholeheartedly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We return to the scene of Loki's job for some long expected fluff.

Loki blames Tony for this. He really does. If Tony hadn't gone and vanished of for a good half hour, he could have dealt with Odin, and this whole awkward situation could have been avoided with ease.

He's making a frappe now while simultaneously boiling milk and having an argument with Odin (Well, it's not really an argument. Mostly he just sits there while Odin heaps abuse on him about this and that.), his hands darting in and out of the complicated array of machines.

"Working in a coffee shop, changing your name, what were you thinking? You're tearing the family apart with your attitude," Odin says, Loki mouthing the words along with him. Behind Odin, Darcy is pulling faces in at attempt to keep his spirits up.

He hates to say it, but it isn't working.

Just when Loki thinks it can't possibly get any worse, ("Disgrace to the family, when your mother hears-") the bell above the door tinkles and Bucky and Natasha stroll into the Cafe Vengeance, looking like they own the place. Loki's eyes widen. Shit, not good, not good." The pair makes their way over to the counter and stand directly behind Odin. Please don't, he thinks silently. Of course they do. Bucky twists Odin's arm behind his back at a painful angle while Natasha smiles pleasantly at him. It is a terrifying smile.

"Excuse me, sir," she says, "You seem to be disturbing a personal friend of ours, so we're going to have to ask you to leave now." Odin locks eyes with her for a moment, then rips his arm from Bucky's grip and hurries out. Loki stares. It is the first time he's seen Odin ruffled and it takes some getting used to. 

"What can I get you?" he asks the pair. He does not thank them, nor do they expect him to.

Bucky orders for the pair of them, and Loki finds it oddly comforting to not think about the drinks and simply let his hands do the work. He gives them the drinks, takes the money, (It is exact change, as usual.) and they take their normal seat in the corner, where one can look out the windows and the other can watch the front door. Loki thinks that Bucky and Natasha must be the strangest people he's ever met.

In the ensuing lull, Darcy nearly sneaks up on Loki (She's been trying for a week now, and her attempts are getting kind of pathetic) and taps him on the shoulder.

"Yes?" he says, raising an eyebrow. Her face falls slightly.

"So who was that?" she asks, jerking her head towards the door.

Loki sighs. "That was my adoptive father," he replies. "We don't really get on well."

Darcy's lip quirks. "Yeah, I kind of gathered that. What's the story with you two?"

"He didn't tell my that I'm the actual son of a major business rival until a few months ago. And apparently the only reason I was adopted was so he could have some leverage over my biological father." Loki smiles bitterly. "As you may have guessed, I didn't take it all that well."

She winces. "Ouch. That's got to be traumatizing. What about Thor?"

"Didn't know."

"Eesh. So you decide to work at a coffee shop to piss the old man off?"

Loki raises his hands. "Hey, that wasn't actually deliberate. I just walked in here for coffee and Tony assumed I was a new hire. I saw no reason to undeceive him."

Just then, Tony walks out from his office, water bottle in hand. He joins them at the counter, staring at the busy shop. Then he glances at the two of them. "You two were having a conversation." Tony thinks, then looks at Darcy, shock evident in his face. "You actually got him to talk?" Tony points at Loki, who shrugs. "I've been trying to get him to talk for weeks now. What does his voice even sound like?"

Loki looks at him disapprovingly. "You know, just because I don't talk to you doesn't mean I don't talk to anyone else, Tony."

"Oh my god," Tony exclaims. "You totally sound like some British Shakespeare actor or something." He throws up his hands. "I can't even handle this right now."

They wait until Tony disappears into his office again. "Okay, that was kind of weird," Darcy says.

Loki nods his assent, then goes back to boiling the milk. He wonders why Odin chose to come in person. Could he not have sent an email instead?

"Hello. Hey." Darcy waves a hand in front of his face, then directs his attention to the counter, where a stocky man with rumpled hair is standing.

The man shoves his glasses farther up on his nose. "Um, I'll have a chocolate chip muffin and a black coffee, please."

Loki nods, takes his money, and glances over his shoulder at Darcy. She grins and starts moving around the kitchen busily.

They man stares at Loki's nametag. "Oh, so you're Tony's new employee. I've been hearing a lot about you." He stares at the man suspiciously. "Perhaps I should introduce myself. I'm Bruce Banner, Tony's science bro." He makes finger quotes around the last two words.

"Hi," Loki says warily, handing Banner his coffee and muffin. "Have a nice day."

Bruce takes the hint and sits down with Bucky and Natasha, who welcome him with surprising enthusiasm. They pull out matching manila folders and start discussing something animatedly.

Loki turns to Darcy, who is now playing on her phone. "What's with the folders?" he asks.

She shrugs. "It's some kind of project. Jane won't shut up about it." Darcy pauses. "Actually, it sounds like something you'd like. Monsters and magic and all that."

An hour later and Loki is beginning to wish the three had picked a table that isn't quite so close. They've been arguing and talking loudly, and his headache is intensifying rapidly. Darcy has left, as her shift is over and she has a political science class to attend at the university. Tony is barricaded in his office, no doubt with copious amounts of alcohol. Finally, he's had enough. Loki marches over to the table and stares down at the trio until they are all silent and looking up at him. "I realize that this is a public establishment," he says, " but I am just about at the end of my tether. You need to be quieter or so help me, I will kick you out."

Bucky recovers first. "Well, maybe we'd be more quiet if we could figure this out."

Loki can't help it. He rolls his eyes. "What is it, anyway?"

Bruce pulls up a chair and shoves some papers over, clearing a space for him to sit down. "By all means. If you can help, we'll shut up. Right?" He casts a challenging gaze at the other two, who nod in unison.

Loki sits, suddenly self conscious. "Okay. What's the problem?"

"It's got something to do with Jane's research, which is very...odd. She's researching stuff in old books in order to understand modern science." Natasha gestures at the pile of papers. "She gave us these, but they make no sense."

"All these references to Norse mythology, which we know nothing about," Bucky chimes in.

"Okay, I know about this." Loki picks up the nearest stack and starts talking them through it, explaining the allusions and making notes. Natasha nods along, Bruce looks confused for the first ten minutes, and Bucky stretches, watching Loki the way one watches a particularly interesting lab specimen.

Truth be told, it makes him a little uncomfortable.

An hour later and they are all discussing the documents on equal footing. Loki checks the time on his phone. 8:02. He really needs to close soon.

"Well, thanks," Natasha says, stuffing papers into her bag. Loki shrugs.

"No, seriously," Bucky continues. "We got more done today than we have in a week. Couldn't have done it on our own."

Bruce finishes his forgotten muffin and picks up his briefcase. "You ever need help with something, give me a call." And he hands Loki a business card. Natasha picks up his phone and starts entering her information. Bucky takes it out of her hands and enters his, then hands it back to Loki. Then the three head out into the night, leaving Loki standing in an empty coffee shop, phone in hand.

What an odd day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that happened. I hope you're happy now, Sarah. I wrote it, and now we can return to our regularly scheduled Stucky. But hey, you guys? Totally go check out Loving-Neko on fanfiction. SHe's cool
> 
> Coming up there will be Fablehaven. LIke a lot more that I need to type. (Yeah, I know. The one nobody cares about.) Also maybe some Les Miserables. (Enjoltaire!) and yet another prompt that I'm looking forward to writing.
> 
> Kay bye.


End file.
